'I know who Mark Twain is! He's Shania's husband': 25+ Times people realized they were dating an idiot

Author image for JR Atkinson
JR Atkinson • Writer and Editor
Jul 11, 2024 3:00 PM EDT

We're all allowed a little blonde moment every now and then. You can be so smart and gifted in your area of expertise, but completely ignorant in others. For example, I am so miserably bad with directions that I could easily get lost in a couple blocks radius of my childhood home. It doesn't matter how long I've lived somewhere or how many times I've made the journey, I am bound to take the wrong turn at the wrong time. I'd like to consider myself a competent person in other arenas, but I can't help the way my brain works. 

But different folks have different blind spots, and some are bigger than others. It's completely forgivable to need a little education now and then, but a fundamental misunderstanding about how the world works… that's harder to get over. Especially if you're dating someone. But they sure are fun to read about, and might make you feel a little bit smarter. 

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  • 01
    "She said she really hated Italian food... she ordered lasagna"
    via Tron Le
  • 02
    What was your "I'm dating a moment? idiot"
    via u/dm_me_yourtiny****
  • 03
    GameVoid 22 hr. ago • She said that the temperature in her house never changed, so she couldn't understand why she was always hot/cold. She had never taken the packaging off of the digital thermometer, so she was just looking at a sticker that said 72 degrees.
    via u/GameVoid
  • 04
    InevitableRhubarb232. 13 hr. ago I thought I had a blue dishwasher for 10 years. Nope. The people before us just never peeled the blue film off the front. It's black.
    via u/InevitableRhubarb232
  • 05
    TwattySeahag · 1 day ago The first time he stayed the night I heard him talking to his friend on the phone the next morning (this was before texting) and he said, "Hey man guess what this girl has, like, BOOKS and 11
    via u/TwattySeahag
  • 06
    MainKaleidoscope4942. 1 day ago When I mentioned that a particular restaurant made their own pickles and he firmly corrected me, informing me that "pickles grow on bushes."
    via u/MainKaleidoscope4942
  • 07
    AdSalt9219 1 day ago • College girlfriend who was not a fully-functioning adult. Zero life skills. Got a flat tire while driving alone, stood by the car acting helpless until a guy stopped and offered to help. He changed it, but unbeknownst to her had set the parking brake. She
    via u/AdSalt9219
  • 08
    gets in her car and it won't go anywhere because the parking brake was set. She runs out of the car and asks the guy, "my car won't go, did you put the wheel on backwards?" No, she actually told everybody about it.
    via u/AdSalt9219
  • 09
    AdInevitable2695 1 day ago • My ex would find a recipe online, not follow it, and blame the recipe for being . Things like subbing breadcrumbs with flour, adding pepper flakes in dishes that are not spicy. Those were the most disgusting swedish meatballs I've ever had.
    via u/AdInevitable2695
  • 10
    Valuable_Cookie8367⚫ 1 day ago edited 11 hr. ago My Hispanic date said she would never marry a black guy because she didn't want to have Puerto Rican kids Edit: she wasn't joking
    via u/Valuable_Cookie8367
  • 11
    • jlaux 1 day ago Google had an April Fool's joke one year where if you lick your phone screen, you can actually taste the object of what's being displayed on the screen. Needless to say, she did it several times and said it didn't work.
    via u/jlaux
  • 12
    jsmys 23 hr. ago We watched Shrek and she didn't believe that the guy who voiced Shrek was the same guy who played Austin Powers because "their accents aren't the same." I explained that it was the same actor doing different voices. She couldn't fathom it.
    via u/jsmys
  • 13
    DJBreadwinner · 1 day ago · edited 18 hr. ago We were walking together in a park when an older lady with a small dog passed by, and she, inquiring about the dog, asked the owner, "is that a Belgian Waffle?" I laughed my ass off and thought it was the funniest joke I had ever heard until I realized she was entirely straight faced.
    via u/DJBreadwinner
  • 14
    • thatsprettylitbro 1 day ago An ex dropped me off the first day at a job. He was late picking me up and when I called 30 min after my closing shift to see what was up, he said it was because the car was stolen. I called to find another ride so a friend came to get me instead. Homeboy drove across the street to get a soda AND WALKED HOME. HE FORGOT THE CAR. We saw it on the way back to the apartment.
    via u/thatsprettylitbro
  • 15
    Boris9397 23 hr. ago · edited 21 hr. ago I took her out to dinner, gave her two options: an Italian restaurant or just like a regular restaurant where they served all kinds of stuff. She said she really hated Italian food, so we went to the regular restaurant. Where she ordered a lasagna.
    via u/Boris9397
  • 16
    Sudden_Exorcism 1 day ago We had a heated debate about whether or not dinosaurs were alive during the American Revolution. Her stance was 'there's really no way to know'
    via u/Sudden_Exorcism
  • 17
    ZestycloseBrush1590. 1 day ago She always told me how much she hated tide pods. over regular detergent. I told her it was easier. Then I seen her doing laundry one day with them, she was rippling them open and squeezing them into the laundry individually
    via u/ZestycloseBrush1590
  • 18
    • theredgoldlady 1 day ago. edited 21 hr. ago In my early 20's, I started living with my boyfriend at the time. I got my period and he demanded to know what I had done with the egg. Folks, this 21-year-old man, whose mother was a nurse, who had a sister that had just given birth to twins, thought that human women LAID AN EGG when they had their period.
    via u/theredgoldlady
  • 19
    ajellis13 1 day ago Not sure if she's the idiot or her friend. She got a tattoo from her friend with the word Angle on it. Obviously it was supposed to say Angel.
    via u/ajellis13
  • 20
    • MrApophos 1 day ago When they tried to argue with me about whether babies can breathe underwater or not. Protip: they can't.
    via u/MrApophos
  • 21
    Complete-Source-5928. 1 day ago Ex of my best friend: thought that a (online-) cloud is located in the actual clouds and was really concerned about his data getting lost when it started raining. Dude was 19 and working in trades
    via u/Complete-Source-5928
  • 22
    Daedricbob 1 day ago She comes back to my flat. I have a big well-stocked marine fish tank at the time with loads of fish. She tries to look interested (she wasn't), then asks me how I stop it overflowing from the fish peeing in it all the time.
    via u/Daedricbob
  • 23
    AceButcher 1 day ago We were eating curry and we got talking about rice. She didn't believe that a rice plant produced more than one grain. "Now that would be an incredible amount of rice plants just for our meal" got her to start thinking she might be wrong.
    via u/AceButcher
  • 24
    Darklydreaming93 1 day ago She tried cooking spaghetti in the microwave. I was awoken by the smoke alarm and in the microwave was dry spaghetti noodles. in a bowl with a cup of spaghetti sauce. The noodles were burning.
    via u/Darklydreaming93
  • 25
    Ohfuck 1 day ago • My ex came over after doing yard work. The next few days I began itching terribly. Poison Ivy. I asked. him about it because I am incredibly allergic to it. He said he cleaned out the poison ivy in his backyard but took a shower before coming over. But then put the same clothes back on.
    via u/Ohf***
  • 26
    Dash Harber - 23 hr. ago "Wait, monkeys are real, right?" "I know who Mark Twain is! He's Shania's husband, right?" After watching Bowling For Columbine "Americans aren't going to cross the border and shoot at us, right?" She was in her mid 20's.
    via u/Dash_Harber
  • 27
    Ghostyped 1 day ago My ex-wife said that the reason I don't enjoy the big Bang theory is because "I don't understand astrophysics" while snapping her fingers
    via u/Ghostyped
  • 28
    Ok_Honeydew_1946 1 day ago After moving in together. Me: "your breath is kicking go brush your teeth" Him: "I don't brush on the weekends" He was 27. 27 years old and didn't brush his teeth on the weekends like a 5 year old. I should have ran then instead of waiting a year.
    via u/Ok_Honeydew_1946
  • 29
    Hot_potatoos · 1 day ago My period arrived when we were at dinner and he asked me to 'hold it'
    via u/Hot_potatoos

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stupid memes dating fails dating nightmares blonde askreddit dumb people stupid people dumb questions funny people dumb idiots idiot reddit thread Reddit funny stupid dating stupidity
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